It’s been a very restless 3 to 4 weeks. This is because I’ve been suffering from the worst bout of insomnia I’ve had in about 20 years!
Back then, in the early 90s, I used to suffer from insomnia all the time but I learnt a self-hypnosis technique which pretty much killed it in a few weeks. And since then apart from the occasional night or two when I don’t sleep very well (usually associated with the full moon), I’ve been sleeping very well. Until about a month ago when for some inexplicable reason I just stopped being able to nod off.
I was just not tired!
I’d go to bed in my normal way at my normal time and I would just not fall asleep. And if I did fall asleep it’d be for 40 minutes or so only – and then I’d be wide awake for the rest of the night. It even affected my afternoon snooze. Normally at 3PM I feel very tired. If at work I struggle to stay awake and if at home, I just take a 20 to 40 minutes nap on the sofa. But nothing. Not even a yawn. Yikes.
I’ve not really suffered from insomnia like this ever before. It was just an absence of feeling tired in any part of the cycle of the day and night. Getting to sleep was an absolute effort of lying there and just trying to drift away–meditation, cajoling, trying not to damn think about anything or get annoyed! It was very very difficult. For two weeks, hardly any sleep at all. I’m a problem solver and tried to work out what the cause may be. But I wasn’t worried about anything nor under any kind of stress (other than not sleeping). I’d not changed my diet or habits. there was no reason, which made it doubly troubling.
But now it’s a week and a half and I’ve been sleeping perfectly normally again. Long enough for me to hope that this is over and done with. But it has led me to wonder about those poor sods who deal with this affliction from night to night, week to week, month-to-month and year to year. I was suffering for only a couple of weeks and I was rundown tired. I was irritable and depressed, my attention span was non-existent and I was less effective in my daily job. And, of course, my writing was also undermined. I found it almost impossible to get anything done because I just didn’t have the concentration level required–which I normally take for granted.
I went to bed, closed my eyes and woke up ten hours later! Hurrah. As to why my sleep returned? I have no idea, but it has given me an appreciation of what insomnia sufferers have to deal with. And it is now with a sense of accomplishment when I wake up after a night of uninterrupted sleep.
I’m off for a snooze ZZZZZ